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Who doesn't love a good joke?

Here are some real zingers to share with family and friends. Who would have thought math could be so funny?

Units of Measure You Rarely See

Time between slipping on a peel and smacking the pavement: 1 bananosecond
1 million bicycles = 2 megacycles
10 cards = 1 decacards
8 nickels = 2 paradigms
10 aches = 1 kilohurtz
10 microphones = 1 megaphone
10 noses = 1 piconose
453.6 graham crackers = 1 pound cake
2 untruths = 1 paralyze

Have You Heard This One?

How can you make time fly?

    Throw a clock out the window!

Why did the math book look so sad?

    Because it had so many problems.

What kind of food do math teachers eat?

    Square meals

Why didn't the quarter roll down the hill with the nickel?

    Because it had more cents.

Where can you buy a ruler that is 3 feet long?

    At a yard sale

Why is the longest human nose on record only 11 inches long?

    Otherwise it would be a foot.

What goes up and down but never moves?

    The temperature

The more you take, the more you leave behind. What are they?


What gets bigger and bigger the more you take away from it?

    A hole

Which is heavier, a pound of bricks or a pound of feathers?

    The same — a pound is a pound!

I'm light as a feather, yet the strongest man on Earth can't hold me for more than 5 minutes. What am I?


Why would you take a ruler to bed with you?

    To see how long you sleep.

Can You Solve This?

You have a barrel of root beer and you need to measure out just 1 gallon. How do you do this if you only have a 3 gallon container and a 5 gallon container?

These tongue twisters were compiled by Edie Coletti for Great Expectations

Zero by a Different Name

image shows a digitized zero

The number zero has lots of different names, some of them downright funny!

  • Nought
  • Naught
  • Nil
  • Zilch
  • Zip

Playing with Numbers

Did you know that the abacus is one of the oldest counting and calculation tools around? People have been using them for thousands of years!!

Practice your math skills with a Cranmer abacus, especially adapted for budding blind mathematicians.

image shows a digitized zero

Math Magic Trick

Try this math magic trick on anyone — you'll love their reaction!

  1. Ask your friend to pick a number between 1 and 9 — but not to tell you what it is.
  2. Ask them to multiply their secret number by 2 — but not to tell you the answer.
  3. Ask them to multiply their answer from step 2 by 5 and to tell you the answer.
  4. Drop the zero from the number they tell you and you will get their original secret number!

Here's an example:

  1. Secret number = 4
  2. 4 x 2 = 8
  3. 8 x 5 = 40
  4. Drop the zero from 40 and you get the secret number — 4!!

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